I come across as bitchy some times, but it is not meant that way. Having horrible anxiety it is hard to talk on the phone or leave my apartment. So when I do go out and have to stand up for myself I think I come across as bitchy. The problem is that is just how I sound when using all of my will power to speak and clearly get my point across in the least amount of communication. I feel bad for those who are just asking questions, which I answer but if you didn’t know the internal struggle you would think I was a cold jerk. If I don’t have to confront, even for the smallest of things,  someone I am very sheepish and don’t make eye contact. I still want as little contact as possible but I just look like there is something wrong with me, which there is.

I used to have resting happy face. Even in my passport photo I look happy. My blank normal face is just content and happy. My resting face is stoic now.  Void from all emotion. So it is not hard to see how I seem rude, which is just not me. 


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