I get to go to my social worker and have panic attacks leaving my house. What a wonderful gift. Normally I have a party, but this year not so much. I always have to plan my own parties, unless it is the party my sister has for me which is really just her, her fur babies and her husband and me. For her birthday she comes to my place with my fur babies. We decorate, buy special party plates and napkins, have treat bags. We usually colour and watch movies too. I did that this weekend which was really nice. (To be honest we both love our tiny parties.) I don’t have it in me to plan even something small. I just did the full birthday thing for my cousin.  I love my birthday but this year due to anxiety and depression I just don’t care. When healthy I will have parties all the time and for no reason.  I love them. If they have a theme all the better. So to sum up panic attacks and uncontrollable crying is how I am ‘celebrating’ this year. What a magical gift. 

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